Jacky Jasper

Here’s a list of my top five fav songs. But tomorrow, I’ll more than likely be feeling a totally different five because it’s hard to not cover all great artists like Pink Floyd,Marvin Gaye, Parliament/ Funkadelic, Cameo, Con-Funk-Shun or Zapp featuring Roger Troutman.

Damn there’s also Run DMC, David Bowie, Bob Marley, Santana, Ozzy Osbourne and The Bar Kays too. And, how can I forget Michael Jackson and Quincy Jones? That’s why I’m happy this is my site. Know why?

Because I can name a Top 5 anytime I want to mane…

5. Spacey Love by Rick James

4. Side by Slave

3. Ballad Of Dorothy Parker by Prince

2. It’s A Man’s World by James Brown

1. Contradiction by Ohio Players

Urban Guru Jacky Jasper -

5. Kelsey Grammer’s third wife, former Playboy model Camille Donatacci Grammer – Because the couple are no longer together, sources say the 41-year-old ex-bunny is very lonely and is looking for a young stud. So, here’s some tips for the Gigolo who’s trying to get into Camille’s finances. (Sorry…I meant panties.)

First, you must like to spend time with her children. She has two kids, Mason is 8 and Jude is 5. Not to worry, it’s not hard work…you’ll have to attend amusement parks and you must be able to take the kids to the cinema.

Camille has been married to the boring actor Kelsey for 13 years, and I’m told she has cobwebs between her legs. This ex Playboy model needs some good loving, and she’ll pay for it too…with Kelsey’s money!

Camille separated from her right wing husband because she wasn’t getting enough attention. Now, she’s looking to do a reality show (a Beverly Hills version of “The Real Housewives”.)

Camille has a weakness for Caucasian and Latino athletic men, but she’ll let a Afro American male smash when her kids ain’t around. Sources say she would love to have a relationship with Taylor Lautner.

4. Charlie Sheen’s ex-wife Denise Richards - Denise is 39 and horny and lonely. She has two daughters, and a lot of Charlie Sheen money to spend. Here’s some tips for the Gigolo who’s seeking to get into Denise’s finances. (I meant to say panties.) You must like animals because this ex Aquarius fashion model has a a lot of pets…she even has a pet pig! She’s suffered a lot pain from being with Charlie Sheen, and she now believes in sweet revenge.

Sources say to get back at Charlie, Denise likes her coffee black. She has a thing for Barack Obama (so to the look a likes of the 44th president of the United States Denise will love to pay you some of that Charlie Sheen money!)

Continue Reading…

Jacky received an email from friend and colleague Al B. Sure today. Seems the prognosis for his mother’s cancer has taken a turn for the worse. Please take a minute and leave your well wished for Al B and family below.

Greetings Family, Friends, Colleagues,

If you are receiving this email you are very special to my mom and myself so I felt the need to share and send an update. As you know mom was diagnosed with breast cancer this year and it has been quite a journey for mom with the chemo therapy and several trips per week to the Dr’s office for months and I have not left her side because she’s my best friend as well as I am her biggest fan (Yes, I’m a Mamas Boy and proud of it Lol)!

Yesterday (Monday) Mom had surgery at Marina Del Rey Medical Facility and everyone there was absolutely amazing. Her Doctor is brilliant, very kind and has been more than comforting during the entire process. The surgery (Mastectomy) went as well as expected re the removal of the tumor. Continue Reading…

My UNDATEABLE series has finally come to an end. I would like to thank VH1 for their male-bashing show, because without them listing many men as undateable I would have never come up with my spin on this series. (I would also like to thank the ladies who helped me by contributing their ideas for this top 100 list…You’re the beautiful ones, not the skanks, who are the undateable ones.)

Without further ado, here’s my top 10 items which make a chic UNDATEABLE.

10. Chics who run around the city wearing Los Angeles Lakers leg warmers look like yellow Teletubbies, and guess what? It’s not sexy and it makes you UNDATEABLE.

9. Chics who are privileged to sleep over at my headquarters and leave toothpaste in the sink and on the mirror are UNDATEABLE.

8. Chics who leave their dirty tampons laying around are definitely UNDATEABLE.

7. Chics who create pet names for you have no respect, and are UNDATEABLE. Continue Reading…

There’s this site Lipstick alley, which is much like a message board which has been taking my list of UNDATEABLE things to post on the web, and guess what these stupid little bitches do? Bash me and say I’m UNDATEABLE.

They’ve even gone as far as asking how I would know so much about women. Don’t they know that I know chics mane?

Again, I’m just having fun, because in reality all chics ARE DATEABLE!! But, there’s a loser guy for every loser girl out there…even Whoopi Goldberg!

On that note, here’s the continuation of my countdown:

19. Chics who say they only eat organic food and pretend to be a health freak, yet can’t wait to sniff up all the cocaine at the party is sign of a confused person. That makes her undateable.

18. A chic who just had sex with you before going to the other room to call her boyfriend (but they tell you she’s calling her girlfriend), is not only a liar, but is UNDATEABLE. Continue Reading…

If you just tuned in, let me bring you up to speed…I’ve seen VH1′s so-called “UNDATEABLE” program really as a male-bashing show promoting a male bashing book.

This segment is my rebuttal to that show, and here at HSK we’re just having fun. So ladies don’t be offended…just join in and laugh along with us.

Thank you.

Yours truly,
Jacky

With that being said, here we go…

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29. Chics who have rough hands and/or have calluses can not give a gentle touch to a males private area. That makes you UNDATEABLE.

28. Chics who force you to watch television shows like The Hills, The Kardashians and the worst film ever made “Sex And The City” are UNDATEABLE.

27. Chics who are missing teeth (like Tiger Woods’ mistress, Jamie Grubbs) are UNDATEABLE. Continue Reading…

It’s great so many people are taking this so serious. Every day Jacky provides numerous ORIGINAL articles and this is one we knew would piss people off and a popular topic what with the male-bashing undateable list currently running on VH1.

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So here we go again…

39. Chics who have ashy skin are UNDATEABLE…If you don’t have the time to moisturize your skin, you don’t have the time to cater to me.

38. Chics who will try to seduce you with a cheap bottle of wine are UNDATEABLE.

37. If a chic stays at your house overnight and when she leaves you to discover that she’s left make-up all over your pillow (like a clown was in your bed) is UNDATEABLE.

36. Chics who kiss their dogs on the mouth and then they come to kiss me are not only nasty…they’re also UNDATEABLE. Continue Reading…