It’s Cottage Season @ Uncle Tom’s Cabin!!!

Rupert Murdoch and the Fox News team have re-opened Uncle Tom’s Cabin, a spot used by many as a weekend getaway, for some summertime enjoyment.

You may remember the doors of Uncle Tom’s Cabin were first opened for the summer back on July 4th, but that’s when not many blacks were invited. Know why? Because construction of the ground wasn’t quite completed, with the cotton fields and man made swamp not ready.

Now, everything is in place…the cotton fields…the watermelon patch…the look-out tower, and a huge swamp containing alligators and mosquitoes imported from India, surrounding the grounds. The grounds features a beautiful colonial 300-room cabin that’s ready to house some of America’s biggest racists and silly Negroes.

July 16th will mark the season’s opening ceremony. That’s when Cabin Chairman Bill O’Reilly will be presented with a blank check from oil company BP…and you better believe Bill will be going all out at this year’s summertime festivities! Bill has organized a roast for Republican chairman Michael Steele, complete with an all-American panel. Guests expected to join Mr. Steele for the roast are: Sean Hannity, Tea Party leader Mark Williams, Carlson Tucker, John McCain, Ann Coulter, Lindsey Graham, Dennis Miller, John Boehner and Glenn Beck. Plus, I’m told Cleveland Cavaliers owner Daniel Gilbert will be flying in just to advise Mr. Steele in giving up his seat only to return back to being a slave, like his forefathers.

After receiving his invitation for this Friday’s event, Sean Hannity picked up his cellphone and called Bill O’Reilly. “Bill tell me more of what you have planned,” ask Sean. “It’s going to be something special Sean…no pinhead stuff, not on my watch,” Bill replied. “I have Toby Keith singing our National Anthem. I’m tired of others singing our beautiful national song, ruining it…It makes me cringe, Sean. Every time they have someone like Puff Daddy singing our national anthem, George Washington is rolling in his grave…It’s un-American to have Madonna sing our National Anthem…she’s a lesbian for Christ’s sake! After Toby sings our National Anthem, I have a surprise for Rush Limbaugh.” Sean nodded. “What’s that?” asked Sean. Bill’s face lit up with excitement. “I got James Earl Jones singing his favorite slave song ‘Wade In The Water’,” exclaimed Bill. “And…right after that I have Whoopi Goldberg, Cuba Gooding Jr. and my favorite coon Flava Flav doing a buck dance routine while dressed in traditional colonial slave garments!” Sean laughed “Brilliant O’Reilly!” said Sean. Bill nodded and continued. “I’m going to out shine Glenn Beck and Rush Limbaugh,” explained Bill. “I’m the best American ever no pinhead stuff, Hannity…Oh my other line is beeping hold on…Sean I’ll get back to you it’s Mel Gibson on the other line.”

Tune in next week as the Cabin’s opening ceremonies unfold…