Jessica Simpson looks a little BLOATED!!

Who The Fuck is laughing at Nick Lachey Now????

HOLY SHIT! Was this chic performing at the chili cook-off or was she competing in a chili eating contest? This would have to be a perfect example why I won’t fuck with white chics. Unfortunately for Jessica no-one can rationale that, “at least she has a pretty face” cause that shit is BEAT too!

She is hiding numerous rolls of FAT under those strategically placed leopard belts and those hideous (i ate to much chicken & waffle jeans). This was Daisy Duke a few years back, right? She’s been hanging with the NFL’ers for too long, now she looks like a fuckin Linebacker!

Ladies learn from this whales lesson and take it easy on the calorie consumption.

Your Truly,

Benjamin Astor