Lady Gaga’s AIDS Scare

by Jacky Jasper

Lady Gaga says her behavior on the The Monster Ball tour has motivated her to visit the doctor to be tested for the HIV virus. That seems very suspect.

The 23-year-old singer recently made a trip to a New York doctor because she says she hasn’t been making decisions with her health in mind. Hmmmmm…I wonder what kind of decisions she’s referring to.

“I had an HIV test two days ago – and it’s not because I’m taking off my clothes every night with a different man. When I’m on the road, I forget about taking care of my body. I don’t go to the doctor as regularly as if I were in one place all the time. So I woke up and thought, ‘Oh, I’m home in New York. I’m going to see my gyno and I’m getting an HIV test, ” said Lady Gaga.

This news comes after a very open discussion Lady Gaga had with a reporter regarding what she says are the major differences on views of promiscuous men and loose women.

“When a guy says, ‘Oh I f**ked all these chicks this week’, there’s a high-five and giggling. But when a woman does it and it’s publicized or she’s open about her sexuality or she’s free or liberated, it’s ‘Oh, she must have a d**k’. There’s a threat,” said Lady Gaga.

Hey Miss Gaga, take it from Jacky…Bottom line is this: When a woman is promiscuous, she’s known as a whore! And, when a man sleeps around with too many women he’s nothing more than a human dildo. Know why? Because he’s fucking for free mane! And, it don’t matter how much a chic sleeps around, that woman will feel like a slut, because a woman needs love. Dudes fuck around because they’re immature and don’t know what they want, but guess what Gaga? A pimp knows what a bitch needs and it ain’t always dick because they can get that anywhere — it’s love attention and a father figure…someone to tell them the truth and keep their ass in line.

Hey Gaga I think that’s what you need — a pimp, because you’re fucking all these bisexual men and you know it that’s why your ass is in the clinic…You funky ass bitch!!! Every woman needs a man…if not a man, then you need a woman who acts like one. And, I’m not mad at that…just get in where you fit in.