“Dude, I’m freaking out. I’m in way over my head, this chic is seriously a 40 year old woman and dresses like my mom.

The WEED is making it worse!”

KID ROCK collects fur coats, and he don’t like PETA.

Bob (kid rock) and I have some thing in common, we collect fur coats. I collect fur coats, I have a fur hat collection too, I love the Russian Czar look. When I am putting on my full length mink, I dare.

Fuck that, I wish one of those PETA bitches would approach me. It has never happened, and I’ve been sporting the look ever since I was 18 yrs old (u should see my high school pictures i was always a pimp).

Read the rest of this entry »

Canada is so boring! Don’t believe me?

Le Trung from Brampton Ontario Canada had so much time on his hands he made himself a robot bitch. I love this guy.

Le is saying fuck all you ho’s, his robot bitch don’t talk back, she can cook, she’s good at math, she cleans. This robot bitch even helps my man Le with his taxes.

Le said, he’s installing the software so his robot bitch can FUCK. You heard !

He ain’t playing, and all you pimps take note, Le said if you try to get at his bitch she his programed to slap you. So no dirty mackin, Le won’t be having that.

To all you men who actually bought fucked up sex products. Like the Blow-Up Doll or the Pocket Pussy this is for you. Buy this product please do.

It will lower the amount of sexual crimes, oh yes it will! Just like prostitution does, because without prostitution decent chic’s might just get raped.

Ladies most guy’s are sick, I said it. Some will pay for sex ( I can’t do it.) If I help a chic out with a problem, any problem, I am not going to fuck her. She would think that she’s paying me back with sex and that will make me a trick which I most certainly am not. Those chic’s get a free pass. They are my friends. Read the rest of this entry »

So I never intended to do any Q&A stuff, but recently I’ve been getting a ton of questions like this so I figured I would take some time to answer one:

Dear Teddy,

Do you have to be easy to “make-it” in Hollywood?

LOVE,
JANE

Dear Jane…

HOLLA!

HaHa, not only did I laugh at that picture of you that makes Danny Bonaduce’s Anal Herpes infection look like a Picasso but I’m gonna buy a full page AD in LA EXPRESS with your email address you fucking whore.

-TeddyRevolution

Ya’ll probably missed this story. Like the music industry, the news papers are going EXTINCT!

Hollywood Street King and the others are heading up the DAWN OF A NEW ERA!

TOM CRUISE

We sat down with Tom Cruise last night. He was in Toronto doing press for his latest film Valkyrie.

We promised Tom we’d be good to him. He’s a good guy. He’s donating to the the HSK fund, and we highly appreciate that.

Supporting Jacky’s lifestyle will definitely help you on your climb up the Ladder Of $ucce$$

Jacky 2:40

This guy is writing blogs. Mean evil blogs and I love it!

Jamie don’t play around, we gotta give it up to Jamie. He’s saying stuff I would say.

He don’t give a fuck and I am loving it. Jamie ain’t holding back punches. On his satellite radio show he even said Eddie Murphy had a tranny thrown off the roof (jamie is saying eddie murphy had a tranny killed.) Jamie said that, and I am proud of him. That’s some shit I would say.

Jamie said he’s the worst. He said there’s no other evil blogger out there. Jamie said he writes the worst blogs.

My feelings are truly hurt by this. Is he kidding me? I am the fucking wor$t. I won’t tolerate someone like Jaime Foxx challenging me for such a title, as the wor$t.

Just for that am going to review his new album, Oh yes am going to. I will pay 99 cents to download that bullshit song titled “The Brady Bunch.” It’s a song from the new Jamie Foxx CD.  For starters maybe you guys didn’t know but Ill tell you, Jamie Foxx is TONE DEAF! Read the rest of this entry »

Look at this guy he reminds me of me.

Bill Clinton reminds me of me too! Those guys are great.

Normally when I have a cigarette I need a drink (martini) and some sort of female entertainment.

I wonder what president elect Barack Obama needs when he has his cigarette?

click for uncensored picture Read the rest of this entry »

Your ex girlfriend is a prostitute.

She was at my house last night. Nice enough girl, but that German accent reminds me of fat girls. I hate fat girls.

My band was on tour with you and 30 seconds back in 2005 and I have to admit, besides your over the top germ phobia and possibility of one day turning into the next Michael Jackson, I kinda thought you were takin care of business…

Then I moved to Hollywood and saw you with Tila Tequila, and last night I handcuffed your ex girlfriend while she laughed at your song coming on satellite radio and let me fart in her face.

Los Angeles; Day 580.      1:07am      2008

Over and Out,

-TeddyRevolution