Although we had planned to roll out Bollywood Booty week here at HSK, we had an overwhelming number of emails from you guys that you wanted Soul Food for one more week.
Here ya go.

Rihanna was at My House (a club here in L.A.) recently, for Baron Davis’ 30th birthday. I wonder how many guys trying to hit that now…?
Jessica Alba and her douche-bag shitty music producer rich husband were there too, and Jacky too! Britney Spears was dancing in front of me looking a hair less fat than normal – it was a cool event I guess?
Cool, that is, until DJ Corba started spinning a record diss’in Chris Brown. White people got nutty; they loved it.
I wonder how Rihanna felt?

Amy Winehouse is adopting a little black baby. I told you all it’s the new trend – white people with little black babies.
Who is authorizing this adoption? Isn’t she a crackhead? Doesn’t she know that we all know? Stupid bitch!!!

M.I.A. was a flop at Coachella. She was on the big stage and the non-talented bitch couldn’t handle it. She didn’t know what to do so she call fans on stage but security said hell no. M.I.A. told her retarded fans Jake Gyllenhaal and Reese Witherspoon were in the crowd.
M.I.A. said she’ll perform in the tent next time… like I fucking care.

Beyonce has recently (more…)

So the story you’re about to read comes from a man who only left his name as “Scared in Wisconsin”.

I feel bad for you bro. I really do. Im gonna send you some of Jacky’s tee-shirts and some CD’s and hell maybe a hundred bucks

Here is a brief excerpt from a letter I recently recieved from a regular reader of HSK:

Dear God,

I know we havent spoke in many years, I know I’ve sinned and I know I’ve cursed your name, but please get me out of this situation and I’ll go to church everyday!!!!

1 HOUR Earlier….

I was feeling really down on my luck and decided to grab a bitch off craigslist. I never realized as I hungup the phone quite excited to be awaiting St. Paul’s hottest blonde on the internet, I just made my worst mistake…

We fooled around for a bit and she started breathing heavy. Something seemed wrong, the nasal, soft, frog like weaving almost didn’t sound….human.  She eventually got up and skipped quickly back to the bathroom and slammed the door. After about 30 minutes I knew I wasn’t just paranoid from all the glass she made me smoke,  she really must have been far from an average girl…something was wrong with her!

Ten long minutes later I mustered up the balls to just open the bathroom door….I stood there scarried and shitting my pants Teddy. I didnt even know what I was looking at.

What seemed like another ten whole minutes of just standing there frozen like ice, my roomate walked in the house from work, walked over to me, pulled out his Iphone and took a picture. He smokes too much weed…..

Im not gonna post the resty of the story. Because well it only gets more fucked up.

But here is the “iphone” picture he sent along with the letter.

I’ve taken the liberty to highlight some of the odd things in this picture. Odd things besides the whole, THIS CHICK IS CLEARLY A BLOOD-SUCKING ALIEN!!!

I should have titled this blog “Criagslist Is Whack!!”

-TeddyRevolution