FIRST ANNUAL
BLACK HISTORY MONTH
UNCLE TOM’S CABIN RETREAT
sponsored by Rupert Murdoch’s Fox News, Marlboro and Snapple

Tina Turner is so tired of it all. She’s going to take sometime off. She doesn’t want to hear about Huey Newton and all that other black stuff. She’s going to the VIP Cabin Retreat.

Tina is welcomed with a happy outdoor picnic by the Fox News and Friends. The Cabin’s landlord Sean Hannity introduces her to the other guests. People like:

Larry “I hate everything black people do” Elder
Jesse “Jealous” Jackson
Colin “The fucking liar” Powell
The Born Again Christian Prince
Tyler “Flip Wilson” Perry
Tiger “I am asian not black” Woods
Halle “I hate blackmen” Berry
Whoopi “I don’t need to see obama’s inauguration speech” Goldberg
Amy “The republican anal queen” Holmes
Wayne “I wish i could be Sammy Davis jr.” Brady
America’s favorite house negro Tavis Smiley
Diana “It’s time for me change into another gown” Ross,
Michael “I’m gonna get that black fella Obama” Steele
Clearance “I wear female underwear under my gown” Thomas
Lil “I changed my skin color and my nose, where’s my rich white guy” Kim
“I live off the white chic”, Seal
Bob “The house nigga” Johnson

The Fox picnic is totally hilarious. Tyler Perry is dressed in drag as Medea and he’s having a watermelon eating contest with Wayne Brady. Tears are coming out of Rush Limbaugh eyes, he’s having so much fun with these silly negro’s.

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Diana Ross is going to take sometime off. She doesn’t wanna hear about all this black stuff. She’s checking in…

Diana wants to hang-out with her Fox New’s and Friends. The Cabin landlord Sean Hannity greets her and introduces Diana to the rest of confused people of color. People like:

Michael “The jackass” Steel
Larry “I hate everything black people do” Elder
Jesse “Jealous” Jackson
Bob “House nigga” Johnson
Colin “The fucking liar” Powell
The Born Again Christian Prince
Tyler “Flip Wilson” Perry
Tiger “I am asian not black” Woods
Halle “I hate blackmen” Berry
Whoopi “I don’t need to see obama’s inauguration speech” Goldberg
Lil “I only date whitemen now girl it’s goes with my new nose” Kim
Amy “The republican anal queen” Holmes
Wayne “I wish i could be Sammy Davis jr.” Brady
America’s favorite house negro Tavis Smiley

They all flock to Diana just to see what Diana’s wearing. After 2 sips of wine Diana rushes to her Cabin room just to change into another new gown. The Boss returns and her name is Diana. (more…)

FIRST ANNUAL
BLACK HISTORY MONTH
UNCLE TOM’S CABIN RETREAT
sponsored by Rupert Murdoch’s Fox News, Marlboro and Snapple

Wayne Brady is checking in. He’s way overdue and he can’t wait to meet his confused retarded friends at the Cabin.

Wayne is greeted by Tiger Woods, Clarence Thomas, Michael Steele, Larry Elder, Bob Johnson, The Born Again Christian Prince, Amy Holmes, Halle Berry, Whoopi Goldberg, Colin Powell, Condoleezza Rice, Lil Kim, Tyler Perry, And America’s Favorite house negro Tavis Smiley.

Wayne is so happy to meet Sean Hannity the Cabin’s Landlord. Wayne sings and dances right away. Sean is smiling and says to Ann Coulter, “that’s the America I remember.” Wayne is a happy negro, he doesn’t wanna hear about all that Black History Month ish. He’s going to spend some quality time with his Fox News and Friends.

Carlson Tucker shows Wayne to his room at the Cabin and Wayne says to Carlson, “I am so excitied to be here.” There’s only 4 rooms left in the Cabin who’s going to check in tomorrow?

FIRST ANNUAL
BLACK HISTORY MONTH
UNCLE TOM’S CABIN RETREAT
sponsored by Rupert Murdoch’s Fox News, Marlboro and Snapple

Whoopi Goldberg is taking some time off. She wants to join her friends over at The Fox News Black History Cabin Retreat. She’s greeted by Clearance Thomas, Bob Johnson, Tiger Woods, Born Again Christian Prince, Larry Elder, Tyler “Flip Wilson” Perry, Jesse Jackson, the worst bitch ever Condoleezza Rice, Halle Berry, Amy Holmes And America’s favorite house negro Tavis Smiley.

Sean Hannity the Cabin’s landlord congratulates Whoopi on her talk show the View. Sean tells her she’s among friends. Whoopi don’t wanna hear about Black History Month. She is going to spend some quality time at Uncle Tom’s Cabin Retreat.

America’s Top 10 House Nigga’s

10. Goes to Akon -  He worked hard on making the word Convict cool. He  has a video named Paid with all black girls. And the only white girl in the video is a blonde. The blonde in this video is the boss bitch over the black chics. I didn’t watch the whole video, I got sick. He’s from Africa but he won’t speak out loud, or revolt in song about the crimes against his continent. He has a platform and a voice that would be heard. Is he waiting on Bono to sing that song?  He would rather audition for the role of the  Black James Bond.

9. Goes  to Whoopi Goldberg – She’s not getting number 9 because she changed her last name to Goldberg. I respect that, it’s game. Whoopi got game but she fucked up years ago when she was dating Ted Danson he appeared at the Friars roast blackface . Cracking black racist jokes, brian Gumble was disgusted. Ted was tagged a racist and Whoopi came to Ted’s defense and said she wrote  all the jokes and it was her idea. Fuck you Whoopi you are a house niggette.

8. Goes to Wayne Brady – Most black people didn’t even know who the fuck he was and then he did an appearance on the Dave Chappelle Show. That’s when the black community got hip to Wayne Brady. Wayne Brady is the perfect house nigga, he can tap dance, he likes to smile, and he is harmless. He’s the perfect HOUSE BOY.

7.Goes to Michael Jackson – Not because of his surgery or because of his former fat ugly white wife he supposedly got pregnant. I’m not mad at him for having mulatto kids but the kids Michael and Debbie had are full white, not because of that, and not because when he was asked during apartheid to perform in South Africa. He didn’t say NO, Michael said, “I’ll ask my lawyers to see if it’s okay”, not because of that either. He get’s a easy number 7 for dancing with the untalented boy band N Sync. This happened a Few years ago on MTV, white folks took it as he passed the torch to Justin Timberfake. Michael is now a Muslim. I truly hope this religion helps him, he’s now auctioning belongings. Is Michael  going broke, or is Michael fed up, of living the material life ?

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